was reading 'sparknotes' for Tuesdays with Morrie

not sure what love is

feel self-conscious typing 'love'

seems easier to write after having a few drinks

if i stopped drinking completely it would take a few months

before i felt normal 'not drinking,' 'i think'

predicting i would feel more excited 'not working' for a corporation

wanting money seems to equate to laziness

feel like isolated subjects and non-sequitors equate to laziness

when did i stop using isolated subjects, or fragments, in my writing

not sure what 'writing' i am talking about, it's all the same

guess nothing is totally isolated, ever

does just thinking that thought isolate me from something

guess you can be totally isolated from one thing and not everything

was in a room with a lot of people

they were talking about marriage

sensitive about my appearance

felt bad between work and my apartment, really tired, but wrote in my notebook - random stuff

slept for four hours when i got home

need to sleep soon, drinking rum and store-brand soda

feel like i cannot access what i really mean to say though

this first things i type seem really wrong, or bad

forget where i was

but i was thinking, as if i was explaining it though, to someone,

that the earth and moon and sun are a lot smaller in scale

than the way we see them with our eyes

like if the earth was the size of a screw on something in a taxi cab

then the moon would be the size of a piece of sand and be as far away as the sidewalk

and the sun would be the size of a coconut and be as far away as a building a block away

after watching the film Up In The Air, i feel more confident that some of the subjects in this post are potent to people that don't know what they're going to be doing in their 30s.

so i'm going to read this in the morning and either edit it or delete it

peace

wake up time in 2hrs from now